I (still) hate MSN

Is this really an article?

http://movies.msn.com/movies/galleryfeature/comic-book-movies/

I mean, is it? Basically, it says "Hey, there are comic book movies. Some of them have been good. Some of them have been bad. The good ones are so good, they might be hard to top."

And I can't get a job as a writer while these yokels vomit these words onto the screen?

Star Trek primer

With the new Star Trek movie coming out in May and the hype machine going at a full Warp 9.5, I figured it was time to write this up. I’m targeting this for really any sort of causal viewer who is looking for some more info about Star Trek, though I believe my wife and a few friends will benefit from it just as well.

The concentration will be on the original series, though I’ll be touching on the spin-offs and movies.

So, without further ado . . .

STAR TREK
(The Original Series [TOS]; 1966-1969)
Taking place in the mid-23rd century, the original Star Trek chronicled the adventures of Captain Kirk as he led the USS Enterprise NCC-1701through the galaxy on a five year mission, seeking out new life and new civilizations. Along the way, Kirk and his crew were confronted with amazing discoveries as well as an abundance of conflicts - both personal and professional.

Crew:
Captain James “Jim” T. Kirk (William Shatner)
Sucessor to Captain Pike, Kirk took a very hands-on and professional way of commanding the Enterprise. While willing to jump head-first into danger and to stare his enemy straight in the eye to get them to back-down, Kirk was also just as willing to resolve a conflict with diplomacy.

Lieutenant-Commander Spock, Science Office (Leonard Nimoy)
Half-human, half-Vulcan science officer. Loyal to a tee to both Starfleet and Captain Kirk, Spock presents the logical side to every argument – even in the face of his own inner turmoil. This conflict between his cold logic half and his passionate human side has led to tension between him and his father, Ambassador Sarek. Spock also enjoys a strong friendship with Captain Kirk and a rivalry with Dr. McCoy.

Doctor Leonard “Bones” McCoy (DeForest Kelly)
An old southern doctor that believes in both medicine and the body’s ability to heal itself, McCoy is one of Kirk’s best friends and serves as counter to Spock’s logic. A passionate and emotional human, McCoy is a advocate for saving lives.

Chief Engineer Montgomery “Scotty” Scott (James Doohan)
Scotty, a Scottish Engineer, is referred to as a miracle worker by the crew the Enterprise. Incredibly hard-working and dedicated, Scotty has helped save the Enterprise countless times.

Lieutenant Uhura (Nichelle Nichols)
Communications officer and very social and warm to the rest of the crew.

Lietutenant Hikaru Sulu (George Takei)
Navigation officer; fun-loving and athletic.

Ensign Pavel Chekov (Walter Koenig)
Navigation/Tactical officer; wet behind the ears, but ethusiastic. Promoted to bridge crew during second season.

Secondary characters:
Nurse Christine Chapel (Majel Barret-Roddenberry)
Yeomen Jancie Rand (Grace Lee Whtiney)

Notable/Recurring villains:
Khan
(“Space Seed”, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Kahn)


Harry Mudd
(“Mudd’s Women,” “I, Mudd,” “Mudd’s Passion” [TAS])

Kang
(“Day of the Dove,” “Blood Oath” [Deep Space Nine], “Flashback” [Voyager])

Kor
(“Errand of Mercy,” “The Time Trap” [TAS], “Blood Oath,” ‘The Sword of Kahless,” “Once More Unto the Breach” [all three Deep Space Nine])

Koloth
(“The Trouble with Tribbles,” “More Tribbles, More Troubles” [TAS], “Blood Oath” [Deep Space Nine])

Trelane
(“The Squire of Gothos”)

Episodes:
Full episode listings can be found on StarTrek.com, but here’s what I recommend for the fickle viewer. Others may add or subtract to this list. It’s also worth noting that I’m more in favor of the “Remastered” episodes as opposed to the original cuts, mainly for the special effects and better quality picture. That being said, the original versions have a little more to them, as “Remastered” cut out a few small scenes here and there.

Unaired Pilot: The Cage
Aired Pilot/First Episode: Where No Man Has Gone Before

Season One (recommended):
The Corbonite Manuever
Mudd’s Women
The Man Trap
The Naked Time
Charlie X
Balance of Terror
Dagger of the Mind
The Conscience of the King
The Galileo Seven
The Menagerie, Parts One and Two
Shore Leave
The Squire of Gothos
The Arena
Tomorrow is Yesterday
Space Seed
This Side of Paradise
The Devil in the Dark
Errand of Mercy
The City on the Edge of Forever

Season Two (recommended):
Metamorphosis
Who Mourns for Adorias?
Amok Time
The Doomsday Machine
The Changeling
Mirror, Mirror
The Deadly Years
I, Mudd
The Trouble with Tribbles
Journey to Babel
By Any Other Name
The Ultimate Computer
The Omega Glory

Season Three (recommended):
The Enterprise Incident
The Tholian Web
Day of the Dove
Plato’s Stepchildren
Let That Be Your Last Battlefield
The Cloud Miners
The Savage Curtain
All Our Yesterdays

Final Episode: Turnabout Intruder
It should be noted, however, that while this is the last of episode of the original series, most fans recognized Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country as the “true” finale.


STAR TREK: THE ANIMATED SERIES
([TAS] 1973-1974)
Star Trek: The Animated Series was launched in 1973 after syndicated reruns of the original series did impressively well in the ratings. Personally, I haven’t seen much of this show, so I can’t really recommend any of it. It was just recently added to the Star Trek canon.


STAR TREK MOVIES (PART ONE)
After the success of Star Wars and Close Encounters of the Third Kind, Paramount sought to revive Star Trek in movie form. The Original Series cast took the helm (as it were) for the first six movies, with the seventh film (“Generations”) serving as a coda of sorts and passing the torch to the “Next Generation” cast.

STAR TREK: THE MOTION PICTURE
(1979)
Two years and a massive refit later, the Enterprise is put back into service. Captain Kirk takes command again after promising it to Commander Dekker. With the old crew reunited, the Enterprise goes and faces with a massive energy cloud containing a mysterious living ship within.

STAR TREK II: THE WRATH OF KHAN
(1982)
During a routine training mission, Admiral Kirk and his crew are forced to confront a villain from the past – Khan. However, Khan now has a powerful weapon - Project: Genesis - at his disposal. And the ante for Kirk just grows higher as his son and ex-lover become entangled in the conflict.

STAR TREK III: THE SEARCH FOR SPOCK
(1984)
Reeling from the events of the previous film, the Enterprise crew are restrained from returning to the Genesis planet in the hopes of restoring their fallen comrade. Thus, Kirk and his senior staff steal the Enterprise – only to become involved with the Klingons, who seek the destructive nature of the Genesis planet.

STARK IV: THE VOYAGE HOME
(1986)
Returning from their exile on Vulcan with a stolen Klingon Bird-of-Prey, the crew of the Enterprise must travel back in time in an effort to answer the call of an alien probe that is accidentally destroying Earth’s atmosphere.

STAR TREK V: THE FINAL FRONTIER
(1989)
A Vulcan cult leader captures the newly-launched Enterprise-A and takes both it and the crew to the center of the universe in the hopes of finding God.

STARK VI: THE UNDISCOVERED COUNTRY
(1991)
The Klingon Empire, on the verge of complete and total collapse, seeks out a peaceful alliance with the Federation. The Enterprise is subsequently ordered to escort the Klingons to Earth for negotiations. However, when an assassination occurs, the crew is embroiled in a conspiracy to ensure that the Federation and Klingons remain enemies.


STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION
([TNG]; 1987-1994)
75-80 years after the original series, Captain Jean-Luc Picard leads his crew aboard the USS Enterprise NCC-1701-D as they continue Starfleet’s exploration of the galaxy. Their travels aren’t always easy, though, as they encounter danger from the Romulans, the Klingons, the Ferengi, and make first contact with the Borg.

I won’t be going as in-depth here)

Crew:
Captain Jean-Luc Picard (Patrick Stewart)
Commander William T. Riker (Jonathan Franks)
Lieutenant-Commander Data (Brent Spiner)
Lieutenant-Commander/Chief Engineer Geordi LaForge (LeVar Burton)
Lieutenant Worf (Michael Dorn)
Doctor Beverly Crusher (Gates McFadden)
Counselor Deanna Troi (Marina Sirtis)

Additional crew/Recurring characters:
Lieutenant Tasha Yar (Denise Crosby) (Season One only)
Ensign Wesley Crusher (Wil Wheaton)
Guinan (Whoopi Goldberg)
Ensign Ro Laren (Michelle Forbes)
Chief Miles O’Brien (Colm Meany – left after season five)
Doctor Katherine Pulaski (Diana Muldaur)
Chacellor Gowron (Robert O’Riely)
Lieutenant Reginald Barclay (Dwight Schultz)
Kurn (Tony Todd)

Recurring villains:
Q (John DeLance)
Commander Sela (Denise Crosby)
Lursa (Barbara March)
B’Etor (Gwynyth Walsh)
Duras (Patrick Massett)
Lore (Brent Spiner)


STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE
([DS9]; 1993-1999)
Deep Space Nine, formerly a station manned Cardassians during the destructive occupation of Bajor, has come into hands of Starfleet and the Bajoran government. While at first, the Federation seeks only to aide Bajor in reconstruction and recovery, a wormhole is discovered nearby. Not only does it pique the curiosity of Starfleet, but it also serves as a religious discovery for the Bajoran. And, on top of all this, it puts Deep Space Nine and Bajor at a political crossroads. The Klingons, the Romulans, the Cardassians, the Breen, and (from the Gamma Quadrant on the other side of the wormhole), the Dominion all become involved in massive political and religious battle that threatens to engulf most of the galaxy.

Crew:
Commander/Captain Benjamin Sisko (Avery Brooks)
Major/Colonel Kira Nerys (Nana Visitor)
Lieutenant-Commander Jadzia Dax (Terry Ferrel) (Seasons 1-6)
Lieutentant Ezri Dax (Nicole de Boer) (Season 7)
Chief Miles O’Brien (Colm Meany)
Doctor Julian Bashier (Alexander Sidding)
Lieutenant-Commander Worf (Michael Dorn) (Seasons 4-7)
“Constable” Odo (Rene Auberjonois)
Quark (Armin Shimmerman)
Jake Sisko (Cirroc Lofton)

Reoccuring Characters:
Garek (Andrew Robinson)
General Martok (J.G. Hertzler)
Rom (Max Grodenchik)
Morn (Mark Allen Sheppard)
Leeta (Chase Masterson)
Kieko O’Brien (Rosalind Chao)
Kirayoshi O’Brien
Molly O’Brien (Hana Hatae)
Kasidy Yates (Penny Johnson)
Michael Eddington (Kenneth Marshall)
Cadet/Ensign Nog (Aron Eisenberg)
Ishka (Cecily Adams)
Grand Nangus Zek (Wallace Shawn)
First Minister Bareil Antos (Phillip Anglim)
First Minster Shakaar Edon (Duncan Regehr)
Admiral Ross (Barry Jenner)
Tora Ziyal (Melanie Smith)

Recurring Villains:
Gul Dukat (Marc Alaimo)
Kai Winn Adami (Lousie Fletcher)
Female Changeling (Salome Jens)
Weyoun (Jeffery Combs)
Damar (Casey Biggs)
Brunt (Jeffery Combs)


STAR TREK: VOYAGER
([VOY]; 1995-2001)
While tracking a band of Federation rebels called the Maquis, the USS Voyager is thrown across the galaxy into the far reaches of the Delta Quadrant - 70 years from home at maximum warp. Together with the Maquis, Voyager must travel across the expanse of the Delta Quadrant and face down threats from scores of species - including the Borg, Kazon, Viddians, Voth, and more . . . while still up-holding Starfleet’s mission of peaceful exploration.

Crew:
Captain Kathryn Janeway (Kate Mulgrew)
Commander Chakotay (Robert Beltran)
Lieutenant-Commander Tuvok (Tim Russ)
Lieutenant B’Elanna Torres (Roxann Biggs-Dawson)
Lieutenant Tom Paris (Robert Duncan McNeill)
The Doctor (Robert Picardo)
Ensign Harry Kim (Garret Wang)
Neelix (Ethan Phillips)
Kes (Jennifer Lien) (Seasons 1-4)
Seven of Nine (Jeri Ryan) (Seasons 4-7)

Recurring Characters:
Captain Braxton (Allen G. Royal; Bruce McGill)
Icheb (Manu Intiraymi)
Admiral Owen Paris (Richard Herd)
Suder (Brad Dourif)
Naomi Wildman (Scarlett Powers)
Lieutenant Samantha Wildman (Nancy Hower)
Vorik (Alexander Enberg)

Key/Recurring Villains:
Seska (Martha Hawkett)
Culluh (Anthony DeLongis)
Q (John DeLancie)
Mrs. Q (Suzie Plakson)
Q Jr. (Keegan DeLancie)
Borg Queen (Susanna Thompson, Alice Krige)


STAR TREK: ENTERPRISE
([ENT] 2001-2005)
Set 150 years before Captain Kirk took command of the Enterprise, Star Trek: Enterprise follows Captain Jonathan Archer as he commands the USS Enterprise NX-01 – the first Warp 5 vessel to explore space. His historic journey pits him and his crew against not only the Klingons and Romulans, but other races as well – including the Suliban and the Xindi, two races tied to a Temporal Cold War. Archer also proves important in bringing together the founding worlds of the Federation.

Crew:
Captain Jonathan Archer (Scott Bakula)
Sub-Commander T’Pol (Jolene Blalock)
Commander Charles “Trip” Tucker, the Third (Connor Trinneer)
Lieutenant-Commander Malcolm Reed (Dominic Keating)
Lieutenant Hoshi Sato (Linda Park)
Ensign Travis Mayweather (Anthony Montgomery)
Doctor Phlox (John Billingsley)
Porthos (a dog)

Recurring Characters:
“Crewman” Daniels (Matt Winston)
Admiral Forrest (Vaughn Armstrong)
Major Hayes (Steven Culp)
Rivers (Seth MacFarlane – yep, Family Guy)
T’Pau (Kara Zediker)
Captain Erika Hernandez (Ada Maris)
Ambassador Soval (Gary Graham)
Commander Shran (Jeffery Combs)
Koss (Michael Reily Burke)
T’Les (Joanna Cassidy)


Recurring/Key Villains:
Vosk (Jack Gwaltney)
“Future Guy” (voiced by James Horan)
Silik (John Fleck)
Arik Soong (Brent Spiner)
General K’Vagh (James Avery)
Antaak (John Schuck)
Klaaang (Tommy “Tiny” Lisner Jr.)


STAR TREK MOVIES (PART TWO)
Beginning with Star Trek: Generations and following the end of their series, The Next Generation continued the motion picture portion of Star Trek’s franchise. While Deep Space Nine, Voyager, and Enterprise never made it to the big screen, they have had mentions and appearances throughout the four films. The USS Defiant appears in Star Trek: First Contact, and Worf (at the time, a recurring character on DS9) appears in all four movies; Admiral Janeway appears in Star Trek: Nemesis, as does mention of the USS Archer, a ship named after the captain of the NX-01.

STAR TREK: GENERATIONS
(1994)
The mad Doctor Soran seeks to re-enter the time ribbon called the Nexus, which allows those who enter to live out their greatest fantasies. Unfortunately, this means destroying millions of lives and wiping out entire star systems. Aided by the time-lost Admiral Kirk and dealing with his tragedies, Captain Jean-Luc Picard must put a stop to Soran’s terror.

STAR TREK: FIRST CONTACT
(1996)
The Borg have returned to conquer Earth! But even after stopping their invasion, the crew of the Enterprise-E must chase them back into the past, where the Borg seek to assimilate the Earth during the launch of Zephram Cochrane’s first warp ship and the eve of first contact with the Vulcans.

STAR TREK: INSURRECTION
(1998)
In the middle of an area called the Briar Patch, a rustic civilization called the Ba’ku holds the key to a veritable “fountain of youth.” However, corrupt forces within the Federation have teamed with a race called the Son’a, who has dark ties to the Ba’ku. Now, Captain Picard and his crew must defy orders to protect the Ba’ku.

STAR TREK: NEMESIS
(2002)
After Riker and Troi’s wedding, the Enterprise-E is drawn towards Romulan space by the detection of an android similar to Data. From there, they are invited to Romulus proper to meet with the new head of state - a clone of Picard named Shinzon. Shinzon has rallied the slave-populace of Remas in overthrowing the Romulan senate. Under the false pretense of peace, Shinzon not only seeks to kill Picard to save his own life, but to also destroy the Enterprise and eventually, Earth itself.

Which brings us to . . . STAR TREK (2009)

Not much is known about the plot, save that it involves a Romulan named Nero and 24th century Ambassador Spock, both traveling back in time to when Kirk and Spock first meet. It seeks to tell the origin story of the crew of the Enterprise. While it may contradict some information, writers have assured fans that the timeline will not be altered in any huge way.

Like I said, you can visit www.startrek.com for more information. Memory-Alpha is just as good. If I get inspired enough, I may write on of these about the Star Trek books, which are now focus on the Enterprise and Next Generation eras of Star Trek since the spotlight is turning to the original series again. They’re just as good as the shows. Trust me.

Star Trek series . . . off- course

Sorry guys. Still trying to get things settled down. I'm still trying to get my Star Trek series together . . . even though it's a pain in the ass. I've been in a huge Trek mood lately, too. Trying to get my wife to like it. She enjoys the original series, but mostly because of it's high camp value. She did watch some DS9 with me (while, that is to say, she was sitting in the room with me doing other things while I watched it).

So . . . enjoy this awesome Star Trek space battle from my fave DS9 episode "Sacriface of Angels."

The Culmination

What follows is the account of the past two days, in which my grandmother, a quadriplegic of 16 years, saw at long last, the end of her life. She was 86 years old and was cared for by my grandfather. Every day, he exercised her limbs, monitored her health, and tried his hardest to make sure she was still alive.

They've been through many hardships -- extending simply beyond the past 16 years. They were married just as my grandpa entered the military to serve in World War Two.

I heard a number of terms in the past 48 hours. "Lingering," "holding on," "finishing," but I think I like "Culimination" the best. It fits.

What I've written here was written in two seperate sittings: one earlier today at my grandparents and the other shortly after recieving the news of her departure. You'll note these with the tense changes.

----------------

1)
“Thanks for stopping by.”

“I might come back tomorrow, if that’s all right.”

“Of course it’s all right. We’ll always be here. Your Grandma may not be, but she’s alive tonight, God bless her. It’s a terrible struggle, but we’ll see her again.”

The conversation was held over the open dishwasher and in the bright light of the kitchen. My grandfather spoke with wisdom that only a grandfather can speak with; an alchemy of knowledge and experience that was both humbling and vast at the same time. His voice didn’t quiver once when he spoke and it was said in a way that the entire drive home, I kept rolling it around in my head.

My grandmother is dying. They claim she’s been dying since the day she fell and broke her neck 16 years ago. I’ll tell you she’s only been dying for a few months. But, to be honest, my father and uncle see her more than I do and part of me has to take what they say into account.


2)
Before slipping out into the living room on my second visit here in as many days, I just sat on the couch and stared at her face. The only word I can think of is ‘ghastly.’ I don’t even know why; maybe it’s just the expression she has. Her empty, slacked eyes; her jaw moving just slightly in a vain attempt to get more air into her liquid filled lungs. There was a sound like liquid coming from her that mouth and a smell came off her that was foul; it was worse yesterday, by far.

I had to get up and walk away. Just go into another room for a few minutes and regroup. Could I go back in there? Could I stand there and watch her die?

“It’s a hard thing to love your Mom and to want her to die,” my uncle Brian told me about an hour ago. Just before this, I heard him utter something that had become a Woodside mantra the past two months: “I just want this to end.”

When he told me this, my mind went to my Mom and being in the hospital when my Grandma Craver was losing her war with cancer. I wondered if she thought that – I don’t think she did, honestly. But it sparked something that Janine said to me this morning.

“To be honest, I’m not going. It’s going to be hard and it’s going to bring up all these memories about watching Grandma Craver dying.”

(Grandma Craver is sometimes regarded as a sort of patron saint in my family)

So here I am, alone with my aunt and uncle . . . my grandpa . . . and my grandma who is the star of the show.


3)
Yesterday, I was struggling with the fact that I could be at work packing some asshole’s groceries when my grandma died. So I left after 5 hours and went back to my place, where I worked up the courage to call my grandpa. He sounded a little surprised to hear from me, but welcomed me over with open arms.

When I walked through the door, I was a little taken aback by what I saw. My grandma was leaned forward with her face the way I described earlier – open jawed, eyes slacked.

Moments later, I was sitting in the living room with my grandpa and Uncle Brian, being grilled about my up-coming wedding. My aunt Pat arrived – thankfully – which spared me from more of the same. I talked to my Dad briefly, who seemed surprised and caught off-guard by my being here. We had to move some stuff, but I returned with him in tow – at which point, we sat and ate dinner just like any other time. In the family room, watching Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy.

Honestly, just any other visit. It made both my father and me uncomfortable, a fact that he shared with me. I liked that; he doesn’t open up much about that sorta thing and I’ve been trying to get him to lately.

We walked as my grandpa napped and then I went home.


4)
My grandpa and my uncle love to sound clever. They act like goofballs and I like to think I have a little bit of that charm and humor – but it’s unsharpened and dull.


5)
This morning, I awoke and was aware that the she wasn’t dead yet – simply by the fact that I hadn’t gotten a call yet. I sat downstairs this morning, planning my day. The phone rang and I strongly suspected it wasn’t good news; in fact, I was right about that.

But not exactly.

It was Tricia, in her half-panicked, half-crying tone. “My grandpa just had a heart attack!”

I couldn’t believe it. Part of me wanted to make a joke (I did later: “I think your grandpa read today’s script wrong; my grandma was supposed to have a heart attack!”) This added a new dimension to the day; a new struggle; a second concern. Part of me wondered just how the next few days would go. Surely our trip to Pittsburgh was out of the question.

I went to the hospital after dropping off an order for our wedding cake (heh, yeah) and then I went and saw Tricia and the family. I held her as she sobbed into my shoulder, then we had McDonald’s sweet tea and discussed the potentials the day.

After that, I went back to the house for a while and ended up going through some things before I made my way over here. I helped Brian cut down some dead branches.


6)
Yeah. And I’ve been out in the living room ever since, waiting for dinner, hearing my aunt and uncle try not to bicker. My aunt Pat, who has been so great during this whole thing, is seeming to lose some patience. My grandpa is kinda wandering the house and napping. And I’m sitting on the couch in the living room, writing my thoughts. My uncle, as much as I love him, is kinda nosey. I was questioned when I first came out here about what I was doing. As though I’m five and I might break something.


7)
I left not long after dinner and Jeopardy. I took a long way home, then got back and laid down on the couch, getting comfy in my distractions. Tricia’s grandpa’s pacemaker is fucked up and after some tests over the weekend, he should be out soon.

Thank God.

Kyle came home, interrupting my reading, and we chatted a bit about some things that weren’t about death. And then, as he was heading to bed, my phone rang, I saw it was my Dad and saw that it was 11:10 and knew what had happened. I paused, knowing what the call would be.

“Your grandma passed away about half an hour ago.”

Grandpa had been napping, Aunt Pat was in bed, and my Dad and Uncle Brian were sitting the family room when some unusual noises brought their attention to what was happening. And then . . .


8)
And then it was over.

As my Dad explained to me what had happened, I wasn’t full of sadness. I didn’t break down in tears, I wasn’t on the ground sobbing. I just felt . . . relief. Pure and simple relief tinged with a little happiness. Oh God, it’s over. It’s over, she’s free . . .

She’s free.

I have this striking visual in my head of her walking – just like she used to. Walking towards Bob Garthwaite and Granny and even Grandma Craver. It’s corny, it’s hokey, but it’s beautiful in my head.

She’s finally free.

In case you're wondering . . .

Sorry for the lack of up-dates recently, folks. I've had a lot going in my "real life" preventing much of . . . well, anything. My writing these days is sparatic at best, between seeing Tricia and working. Any downtime I get is spent either attending to wedding business and/or just . . . being . . . lazy. Sorry to say.

I've been doing some reading lately, trying to wrap up some books that have been sitting around. One is my re-read of The Dark Tower, which should be finished in the next week or so. Another is a Star Trek novel. I've lost faith in the Trek novels over the past year or so, but I've kinda been talked into giving them another shot. We'll see.

Nothing else, really, has caught my eye lately. I finished All The Sad Young Literary Men, which was unenjoyable until the last 3-4 chapters. I've never seen so much freakin' angst over someone not being able to find a parking space. Seriously. The last 3-4 chapters are vast improvements over the rest of the book, but despite the up-lifting ending, it just wasn't worth the crap. And on top of it, the "happy ending" just seemed so against the grain of the book itself. It's just out of place.

Now that I've ranted about that, I'm sure you're wondering what I have been writing. I mean, I don't write nearly as much as I used to, but I've been working on one project or another since I was 13. There's never been a break, really.

My whole Todd and Kelly story has kinda . . . gone off course? I don't know. It's hard to explain. I love the characters. Absolutely love them. But the story itself is just kinda . . . blah. Blah blah. I don't know. We'll see, I guess.

I'm working on a story now that's a little surprising. It's based on some of my most beloved creations. In middle school and high school, I had this group of super-heroes called the Reality Corps. I had written them into a story called "The New Era." Throughut those tenative years, I re-wrote "The New Era" four times. However, since then, every attempt at re-writing "The New Era" has proven nigh-impossible. Recently, I had a bizzare fit of inspiration where I started writing the Reality Corps in a non-"New Era" story. I equate it with "All-Star Superman," actually. Light on continunity, heavy on mythology. We'll where this goes, though.

I had some other stories. Short stories, taking place in the "Todd and Kelly"-verse. I've kinda taken a break from those as they seemed too forced to me. I'm more than certain that I'll have more tales to tell from that corner of my creative room.

Finally, I have another project I'm working on, but I'm having a helluva time with it. More details when it's done.

In the meantime, I'll up-date this blog when I can. I'm more that certain you'll see more up-dates post-Honeymoon in October.

MSN and the Great Cliches of America

I have a Hotmail account. I of course should have shut it down years ago because it's clunky, but it's just easier because I'm kinda lazy when it comes to that sort of stuff. I mean, I'd have to e-mail everyone with my new address and worry that some people would still e-mail to Hotmail . . . and yeah, you see where I'm going with this.

Anyways, after one signs into their account, we're given a page with various articles (usually Feature and very little actual News). A few weeks ago, I came across this article: "5 Dates No Guys Want To Go On." I then made the stupid mistake of indulging my curiosity and read it. And was horrified.

First off, there's no way a man wrote this article. It claims to be written by a guy named Mark Miller, but I'm betting "Mark" is just an abbreviation for "Marsha." Or something like that. If this was really written by a guy, then (and no personal offense intended) then he must be the Living Cliche. The men he writes about his article represent a league of men that only exist in bad sitcoms and in commericals in which men are played as the stupid married guy. He clearly does not know or understand the modern male.

Let's get the run-down of his list, shall we?

"Hiking
Hiking is an activity many men look forward to with the same relish they take in reading Aristotle in the original Greek, receiving a prostate exam, or attending a Celine Dion concert. The way we see it, nature is way overrated. How many flowers can you smell? How many sunsets can you ooh and ahh over? How many coyotes can you worry about being in the vicinity? Plus, there’s no access to the Internet or email. No TV sports. Bugs everywhere. What about any of this spells fun? Unless you look at fun as the first three letters of funeral.

You want your shot of nature? Invite us to the beach at sunset. Take a blanket and a six-pack, make out for half an hour, then head home so we can get back to civilization. That’s enough nature to hold us for the next three months."

Seriously? Guys don't like hiking? We don't like, say, exercise by taking in pleasant surroundings? And all men hate bugs? Since when? I love the assumptions here, too. We only want to drink beer, watch sports, get on-line, and make out. We surely can't appreciate the beauty of nature and the allure of fresh air.

The fact of that matter is that you'll probably find as many men out on the hiking trail as you'll find women. I'm betting you'll even find as many women that dislike hiking as you'll find men.

Apparently, Mr. Miller hates hiking and thus, has never done it. Certainly not with a woman because I'm fairly certain women don't talk to "flowers" the same way they talk to babies.


"Opera
If given the choice of how to spend a Friday or Saturday night, what guy wouldn’t vote for putting on some uncomfortable formal clothing after spending a couple of hundred dollars for tickets, then another hefty chunk for parking, all to hear overly-costumed and overly-made-up folks belting out tunes that don’t have a beat and don’t rhyme, in a language only U.N. translators can understand? Exactly. And yet we still get the evil look from girlfriends when we try to stay awake during Madame Butterfly by playing a video game on our cell phones.

If we must do something cultural and uplifting, at least make it ballet, where the women are in shape, wearing form-revealing clothing and moving their bodies in ways that cause us to imagine them with us in a variety of other non-dance situations. It ain’t Dancing With the Stars, but it sure beats counting down the seconds ’til it’s over when the fat lady sings."

This one, I might give him. Not a lot of guys like Opera, but I'm pretty sure that there's probably just as many women. And let's not put down Opera. It can be more beautiful and more meaningful than, say, most movies, nearly all Sports, and probably 99% of all video games.


"Travel
If my extensive online-dating experience has taught me nothing else, it’s that, at least according to their dating profiles, the one thing every woman most enjoys is travelling. Yes, they all want to get out of the country and see the world, explore other cultures, become enriched and broaden their horizons. These are all noble and worthy pursuits. Men, however, view travel slightly differently. We even spell it differently. We spell it this way: t$r$a$v$e$l. We also view it as time away from our jobs. This will virtually guarantee that not only will a huge stack of work be waiting for us upon our return (and that our bosses will find out the business runs just fine without our being there), but we’ll no doubt come down with some exotic disease and need to be treated in a culture where doctors are still playing catch-up with the wonders of Medieval medicine.

Got the travel bug, ladies? That’s why God created National Geographic. We’ll gladly treat you to a subscription."

Oh man, I love this one too! Do you see what it implies? Women don't know anything about money, working, how travel happens. It also tells us that the rest of the world is fairly stupid (Medieval medicine?). Further, men don't like to travel -- as we're also jerks.

"Clothes shopping
This is how men view clothes shopping: You get to follow your sweetie from store to store with the added bonus of holding her purse as she tries on one dress, blouse, or pair of shoes after another, while you struggle to convince her that each garment does not, in fact, make her butt look big. (Even the shoes!) Occasionally you meet the eyes of another girl’s boyfriend there against his will, and the look you give each other is as though you’re both begging, “PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY NOW!”

You want to try on clothes? Great, we’re OK with that. Just not in the mall. And we don’t care if you try to sweeten the offer with cappuccino and doing some clothes shopping for us. Instead, here’s what we would be interested in: We’ll light candles, put on some mood music, pour some wine, and you can give us a private fashion show. Oh, sure, it won’t be nearly the same without the neon lights, price tags, and judgmental stares from other women who think we’re perverts as we wait for you to emerge from the dressing room. But it’ll be close enough for us."

. . . I'm going to let him get away with this one because I (reluctantly) agree.

"Relationship workshops
Naturally, we men are going to want to avoid the mistakes we made in our past relationships, and we’re not averse to keeping our current romantic relationship as perfectly tuned up as our cars. But that doesn’t mean we welcome the prospect of attending the “Enhancing Couples’ Intimacy Workshop” or “The Two of You: Closer than Ever! Seminar” to which you’re so determined to drag us. It’s bad enough our intimacy needs enhancing; must we now attempt to jump-start it in a face-to-face with other romantic losers? We’d rather get up at 5 a.m. Sunday morning to join you on a bird-watching walk. We’d rather get in touch with our feelings and cry about what we never got to tell our fathers. We’d rather attend a taping of Ellen.

You want to enhance our intimacy? We’re all for it. Hold our hands, kiss us passionately, give us a massage, get naked with us—you’ll be stunned at the intensity of intimacy enhancement. In fact, let’s start right now. After all, we went hiking with you; it’s your turn to do something we enjoy. Hey, where are you going? Oh, come on, it’ll be fun!"

"Oh, honey, I know we're having some problems, but let's just have sex. Sex fixes everything! I don't care about your feelings, I'm an unemotional dude who is only guided by hormones! You want to get closer to me? Nah, just get closer to my penis."


What's worse is that there's a women's version of this. Being a guy, I originally felt I couldn't comment on all it. But there are certain parts I think I need to address.

"Theme parks
In life, there are roller-coaster people and there are those who get queasy looking at the merry-go-round. Find out which one your date is before you take her to the nearest Six Flags to ride the Mind-Eraser. We know you’re eager to be the manly man as we clench your arm in terror while spinning upside down in a quadruple loop. It’s just that some of us are not aching to toss our cookies in the bushes next to the churros stand while you watch. Sure, we might get to know you better while waiting in those long lines, but we’ll probably have other things on our minds if our stomachs are filled with knots and our hearts are racing in anxious anticipation—like avoiding the next date."

Since when do women hate theme parks? Last I checked, most of the women I know love them as much as the guys.

Are women most likely to toss their cookies than guys? Does the author of this article (Nicole Kristal) really believe that men are only in it so we can be manly-men?

"Chain restaurants
We love a guy who wants to feed us and perhaps even more so a man who wants to pay to feed us. But if you take us to a place we can find in every major city where the interior always looks the same, you might as well feed us lattes at Starbucks. Fast-food joints obviously rank as the worst dinner choices, but corporate restaurants (oh, don’t make me name names… you know the ones I mean!) also lack originality and thoughtfulness. As a general rule, don’t take us to a place where we know what we’re going to order before we walk in. We’d rather be taken somewhere off-the-beaten path—where there are candles instead of fluorescent lights, and we don’t have to listen to Top 40 songs blaring from a speaker overhead. If you have no idea where those places are, remember—God created the Zagat Guide for a reason."

Men hate cooking; women hate Wendy's, Fridays, Applebees, Starbucks, Taco Bell. This is fact and law. Not saying that a non-chain restaurant isn't a good idea, but to assume that guys don't know that it is an insult.

"Gross-out comedies
We know you think the whole dinner-and-a-movie idea is infallible, but not if the movie completely grosses us out. You might find it funny when Ben Stiller is standing near a pier and a fish hook gets stuck in his cheek or when Johnny Knoxville jumps into a vat of plastic balls filled with venomous snakes—we don’t. Men and women have different senses of humor. Various studies have proven this, so try to respect this biological fact and refrain from making us indulge your Three Stooges sensibility for two hours. Your buddies may laugh, but we’ll simply be rolling our eyes."

Really? I just randomly looked five different women I'm friends with on Facebook and guess what? They all have so-called "gross-out comedies" listed in the Favorite Movies. Take that!

MSN -- please fire these hacks. They obviously believe we're living in a society that is populated by somewhat stupid cliched men and women. There's a intense lack of understanding of the modern man and a severe school of thought that women are still living in the 1950s. They clearly have no idea how a relationship truly operates, where both partners get an equal say and are able to come to agreements as far as their plans for the evening.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going for a hike, then meeting up with my fiancee after she's done seeing a gross-out comedy.

Star Trek - Part One: Engage!

Welcome to a new four (or five) part series of blog entries that will center around the one and only Star Trek. Part One (which is here and now) will feature the origin of my love affair of Star Trek and will also elaborate on why I love it as I do. Part Two (and possibly Three if it goes on too long) will focus on the franchise of Star Trek as a whole and will include an overview of the shows and movies. Part Three(ish) addresses the nature of Star Trek fans and my personal feelings towards the fandom. Part Four (or Five) is all about the future of Star Trek -- including the up-coming Star Trek film.

So, let me start off by clarifying something. We are not talking about Star Wars. People tend to think that I love Star Wars. The simple fact is that I don't. I like Star Wars; I enjoy Star Wars. But I don't love it. I'd take a Borg Cube over a Death Star; Quark's Bar over Mos Eisley. I'm not sure why people confuse them and assume that if one loves Trek, then they must love Wars. We're talking about a completely different universe here. I mean, just look at the androids!

I'll take the one that doesn't look like a slighty taller and less bird-like version of Crow T. Robot, please.

Anyways . . . so just how did my love affair of Star Trek begin? Well, okay, let's jump back to 1993. I was firmly into comics back then and had an obsession with X-Men already, so it wasn't like I wasn't a high-level nerd anyways. I remember going into Clicks (now Acme Fresh Market- my employer) and looking at the Star Trek: The Next Generation action-figures and trying to figure out which one was Spock. I then recall being quite ill over the summer and my Dad watching Star Trek XI: The Undiscovered Country while I laid on the couch feverish. I didn't quite get the parallels in that film to the end of the Cold War, but seeing all that action and stuff was enough to interest me. That whole summer, I spent trying to sort through just what in the hell Star Trek was all about. Were their two USS Enterprises? Why two different Captains? Why did the new look so different? What's the space station thing and what's that jelly guy?

It didn't make much sense at first, but by the time the summer came to a close, I had really gotten the hang of Star Trek and it was starting to make sense to me. And I think that was part of the appeal. When I was getting into X-Men, it was very much "go with the flow and grab a bunch of back issues to get caught up." And maybe this where the big divide comes with Star Wars and Star Trek - the one I knew since birth; the other I had to learn about and figure out.

Of course, even to someone that figured out that TOS (the original series) takes place 70 years before TNG (The Next Generation) and that DS9 (Deep Space Nine) takes place parallel to TNG and the up-coming VOY (Voyager) series, Star Trek still often times went over my head. I mean, I was 11 or 12.

But it was cool, y'know? In the 5th and 6th grades, there was always something new the next week. Even if it was boring, it was still on and, really, that's what the action figures were for. To make it interesting.

After TNG ended and I grew older and more mature, my attention really turned to Deep Space Nine. As promised, I plan on doing a huge review on the various shows, but needless to say, Deep Space Nine got to me like TOS got to people a generation before me. Maybe it was because I was older and was better able to appreciate it, but Deep Space Nine really showed me the potential of science fiction. It's not just about ships and aliens; it can be political, religious, and character-driven. The story-telling can be rich and interesting and complex.

This re-opened my eyes and as I was able to view the rest of the franchise with a different perspective. TOS and TNG grew in my eyes; they weren't just shows I liked, they were shows that were a lot deeper than I believed them to be when I was first getting into Star Trek. I became more critical of Voyager and, later, Enterprise.

Star Trek was key to my way of thinking in terms of the television. But it's also more than that.

It's a vast universe of diverse characters and is capable of bringing about a hundred different aspects of the idea of space travel. Some of them good; some of them not so good -- but at least it's different.

Star Trek is a hope for the future, yes, but it also shows us that hope isn't everything and sometimes we need to expand our minds or whip out our phasers to ensure that life continues on and that we can hold together. It is, for a show about aliens, a show about humanity.

~W~

Todd and Kelly's "Vacation"

Sorry to say that Todd and Kelly will be going on a hiatus. I'm not certain of the duration or if they'll even be back. I've been having some serious trouble with this story -- not so much in the general plotting, but the characters themselves.

Todd and Kelly are two characters that I really like; Tricia and I have them developed in a certain way that appleals to the two of us. However, as characters now shoved into the "public" (as it were), they come across as bland and kinda uninteresting. Earlier today, I was thinking about them and just how "perfect" they can come across. Their conversations snap too much, they flirt too much, Todd loves Kelly, Kelly loves Todd. There's no sense of conflict; no drama, I guess.

It's hard for me to find a way to shake them up, which is one of the big reasons why I'm taking a break.

I'm not saying this story is done with; I'm hoping that I can get back to it. There may even be a short story here and there about these two. But I think they need a hiatus while I work on getting the characters and the story to where I want it to go.

But stay tuned; there are some new stories on their way. Let' s just say that no matter what happens with Coffee-Stained Romance, there is still more Todd and Kelly to come.

Coffee-Stained Romance: The Party

Note: We've had a change in format here. The idea of chapters has been dropped; we're now dealing with short stories. There will be more time in between up-dates, but more material. Further, we're working on a copyright for these characters and places. Just so you know. Please to enjoy . . .

COFFEE-STAINED ROMANCE
"THE PARTY"

Kelly woke up to the sound of her alarm and shuffled her way across the room. The apartment was unusually cold and she realized that it might be time to up the temperature (and her gas bill) and bust out the heavier blankets.

The first thing she did was start her coffee. As the aroma of the brew filled the kitchen, she took her shower, discarding her pajama pants and tee shirt on the floor of the bathroom. She emerged a few minutes later, hair up in a towl and robed. She poured her cup 3/4 of the way up and added creamer to dull its pure black thrust.

She sat down on her couch and flicked on the TV. Kelly sipped at her coffee as the news played out before her. Outside, the sky was gray and it looked as though it rained last night. The trees were dull despite their warm colors. It was going to be a quiet day for Kelly. No class, no work . . . she didn't think she'd end up with a day off like this.

After a while, she grew bored with the news. She pulled on a pair of lounge pants (read: pajama pants) and a tee shirt and hungered down with her laptop. Outside, it started to rain pretty hard. Once her computer finished its despressingly slow start-up process - the machine was starting to show its age - she got on-line. Kelly made the usual rounds and finally ended up at Facebook.

Where she had an invitation to a party at Todd's place.

LORREL'S 21st BIRTHDAY!
We will drink, we will be loud, and it will be mother-fuckin' booooooze-time!!1!

"Not very subtle, are you guys?"

She wondered absently about this, about them, about Todd. Kelly seemed to be always on alert about guys. Kelly was always certain that when they were nice to her, they were nice because they liked her -- or at least liked the way she looked and wanted what she had. She felt this same way about Todd. She suspected that he was perhaps crushing on her. Maybe it was the way he wondered about how she felt about "Ultimate X-Men" or maybe it was that he had moved next to her in Comp and Lit.

She was sure, at this point, that he did in fact have a crush on her. It was just a feeling. Just a simple feeling, that's all.

Of course, Kelly didn't feel the same way back. Todd was a nice guy. He was cute and funny, but there was very little common ground. That trip to Starbucks had been a strange anomaly in what had become nothing more than a in-class friendship. He hadn't even IMed her or anything. They friended each other on both Facebook and MySpace.

But that was simply it. Nothing more, nothing less.

Let the boy have his crush, she thought with an amusing smile. It's perfectly fine. He's a nice guy. He probably won't even say anything -- and if he does, big whoop, right? Let him down easy and you'll either get a friend or lose someone who loaned you some comics and gave you a mix.

Simple as that.

She accepted the invitation.

***

Todd was doing fine after two beers. No tingle in his fingers; just a little heat in his cheeks. The party around him was chaotic. He could hear, over the pounding of the speakers, the laughing screams of young women. He heard a few shouts from just outside the backdoor, where a game of Beer-Pong was unfolding. Lorrel was doing shots already in the kitchen with Alex and Roger.

And yet, the one person Todd was really hoping would show hadn't arrived yet. His green eyes scanned the crowd and looked to the door often.

"Todd! Get your ass in here and do a shot!"

Todd complied and followed some slutty-looking chick into the kitchen. There were probably close to thirty party in the apartment, making it a little difficult to navigate. Lorrel was pouring five shots of Jack Daniel's and Todd made sure to have a beer ready as a chaser.

"To school!" Lorrel yelled out, lifting his shot glass high, but somehow managing to not spill a single drop. "To higher education!"

Todd fired it back, the liquid hot and somewhat sweet as it flowed down his throat. He chased it quickly with a beer.

"Got one for me?"

Todd turned around and there she was. Miss Kelly Shaw, with her brown hair back in a braided ponytail, wearing a jacket over a small pink top. She smiled warmly.

He pulled out a shotglass. "You sure? 'Liquor before beer . . .'"

"I thought it was 'beer before liquor.'"

"Well, that's good enough for me," Lorrel stepped in. "Get this girl a shotglass!"

"The birthday boy," Todd said, slapping Lorrel on the back.

"Nice to meet you."

"Same here," Lorrel replied, pouring the next round of shots.

"I need something to chase it down," Kelly stated.

"You can have some of my beer," Todd offered.

"Um . . ."

"Jeez Todd," Lorrel grunted, pulling out a beer from the fridge. "Here ya go."

Kelly smiled at Lorrel; a smile that lasted a little too long for Todd's taste.

They fired the Jack back and Kelly quickly turned to her beer to sooth it's burning journey. Outside, shouts from Beer-Pong echoed into the kitchen.

"Thanks," she said to Lorrel. "Getting the night off right."

"Gotta make that first one count," Lorrel responded.

"So how can you get away with a party this size without pissing off the neighbors?"

"The girt next door - Mellisa - is the one making out with Scott over there," pointed out Lorrel. "The apartment on the other side is empty and the one just after that has two guys who are playing Beer-Pong. They help provide the food and we provide the locale."

"Nice," Kelly replied, taking a swig of her beer.

"You like that kind?" Todd questioned.

She nodded. "Yeah, it's not bad."

"Hey Kelly!" shouted a girl with dirty blonde hair.

"Oh hey Sam. Didn't expect to find you here."

Samantha grinned at her apparent boyfriend. "Alex here is friends with the Beech Hill boys."

"Oh wow, hey, small world, right?" Kelly laughed.

"You two know each other?" asked Todd.

No shit Sherlock, Kelly thought immediately. "Yeah. We have a few classes together."

Samantha and Kelly began to chat. Lorrel walked over and pulled Todd out of the kitchen. "What the fuck are you doing?" he demanded just loud enough for Todd to hear.

"I have no idea." Todd sighed. "I . . . gah . . . nothing's coming out right."

Lorrel slapped his hands onto Todd's shoulders. "Just chill, dude. Relax. Finish the beer, have some more and just have a good time."

"Everything going okay?" asked David, arriving just then.

"Where the fuck you been?" Lorrel questioned.

David lifted a six pack of Smirnoff and a six pack of Mike's Hard Lemonade. "Presents."

Lorrel pulled out a Smirnoff and handed it to Todd. "Go in there and offer this to her."

Todd was pratically pushed into the kitchen. Kelly was still talking it up with Samantha.

"Um, hey Kelly. I have a Smirnoff for you if you want it."

"Huh? Oh no thanks. I've got my beer."

"I'll take it!" Samantha leapt in.

Todd handed it over.

"Thanks Todd!"

When Todd returned to the living room empty-handed, Lorrel sighed, shrugged his shoulders, and turned away from him. David, in the meantime, took Todd by the arms and lead him back through the kitchen, passed the girls, and outside.

"Let's play some Beer Pong."

By the time the game was over, the beer was flat and felt more like a punishment to drink than a pleasure. Todd was starting to feel numb in his hands and had slapped his face to see if he felt anything. He was starting not to. Which was good. It was time to get drunk.

When he returned to the living room, Samantha was nowhere to be found and Kelly was now sitting and talking with a red-haired girl he recognized from Coffee Haven; Danielle, maybe. He gave her a passing looking, but kept walking.

Lorrel was sitting out on the front porch with a pair of friends that Todd didn't really know.

"I need something that'll knock me on my ass," Todd simply interrupted.

"Dude, you're on your own now," Lorrel answered.

Todd was about to reply when suddenly, David appeared at the door. "Hey Todd, I think I just saw that girl you like go downstairs."

"My room!"

Todd moved as fast as he could through the crowd, dodging and weaving best he could to get to the kitchen and the basement door. After finally getting down the stairs, he found Kelly standing in the center of his messy room, looking at a sketchbook on his desk. She jerked her head up.

"Caught me!"

"Yeah," he replied, wishing he had.

"Sorry. I was looking for you and someone told me you were out back and then you weren't, so . . . yeah."

"You came into my room?"

She shrugged. "I was desperate."

"To talk to me?"

Kelly looked down. "Not really. To say good bye. I gotta work tomorrow and I'm already fairly tipsy. I know if I stay too long I'll just keep drinking."

"Oh. Uh, okay."

"Sorry. And uh, I couldn't help but glance at your sketchbook. You're really good."

"Thanks." He paused. "Are you going to be okay to drive?"

"I didn't drive, I walked."

"Oh! Well, let me walk you home at least!"

"What?"

"Yeah. Please. I don't want anything to happen to you."

Kelly looked up in thought, then nodded. "Yeah, sure."


The pair soon stepped outside, the air refreshingly cool after the heat of all those bodies inside the townhouse. Kelly waved at a girl who was sitting on the porch, talking with some guy. "I didn't know you guys knew so many people."

Todd grinned a little. "We don't. People know people . . . and then they all show up."

"Ah, I see. So, you guys have any more parties coming up? I'd like to come when I can actually, y'know, stay and get drunk."

"We're having a huge Halloween bash. I think Lorrell wants it to be even bigger than this one here."

"Geez."

"Yeah. It'll be a blast, I'm sure."

They chatted a bit more, reaching campus. As they made their way around the English Departments and towards the steep hill in the center of campus - in front of the Student Center - Kelly looked at a big group of students running around with no shirts on.

"What is this?" she asked.

"Hell if I know. You didn't see this sort of thing at your last school?

"No. Stark State was just one big ass building. No dorms, no nothing." She looked around then, taking in the sight of campus at night. "I definetly prefer Maxwell. Stark was great, but this actually feels like what a college should be like."

Todd didn't really have much of an answer and went a little quiet. She smiled akwardly at him and the pair kept on going.

"How's your brother?" Todd asked at last. They arrived at the edge of campus now.

"He's fine as far as I know." She said this with a tone that told Todd to not say another word. He recalled her rant at Starbucks and took the tone at its implied value.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to bring up . . ."

"It's okay."

"Uh . . . you look good tonight."

"Thanks. Are you drunk?"

"Honestly?"

"Yes."

He nodded. "A little. The night air - uh, it sobered me up a bit."

"It does do that."

"Hey, Kelly . . . uh, listen . . ." He stammered, trying to get the words straight. Trying to get his half-drunk brain to obey the parts that wanted to ask her out. "I . . . do you want to do something next Friday? Like, get some drinks? See a movie?"

"Oh Lord."

"What?"

"Todd . . ." She stopped and turned to him. "Look, you're a great guy and - "

"Oh come on! That speech?! Seriously?!"

Kelly shrugged. "I'm sorry, Todd. I just don't think of you like that. And, to be honest, I . . . I just kinda got out of this long-term relationship."

"You did?"

"Yeah. I mean, it's been a few months . . . but I'm still just not feeling like dating or going out or anything. Do you understand?"

"I guess so."

"Hey, look. I still want to be friends, okay? You're a cool guy. And I want to read the next X-Men comics!" That last part was an exaggeration.

"Right, right."

She smiled, but it wasn't nor did it look genuine. "I'm sorry, okay?"

"That's fine."

"And we're still friends?"

"Yes, of course."

She stuck out her hand for him to shake. For a brief moment, he felt like just leaning forward and kissing her instead. He fought the half-drunk instinct and shook her small hand.

"Okay," Kelly said, releasing. "I can handle it from here. See you Tuesday?"

"Tuesday it is."

Todd watched then as Kelly walked down the road and turned towards home. Sighing with utter defeat and fighting an unnerving sense of doubt and defeat within him, he turned back towards the party at Beech Hill.

***

His name was Sean Gordon and he was Kelly's first in a lot of ways. First post-high school boyfriend. First man she thought seriously about being married to. First to break her heart harder and with more devastation than all of her stupid high school boyfriends. And, of course, her first lover.

They met at Camp Y-Noah, where Kelly had volunteered to work at the summer after she graduated. It turned out he had been living just up the road a few miles and in a small allotment tucked away off Route 619.

He was her age, their birthday just a few weeks apart. She was taken immediately by his soft green eyes and those black curls that fell across the brow of his face. He was a sweet-talker, always flattering -- to the brink of making her blush furiously, face burning red. But more than anything, there was a sense of maturity within that she had never seen before in someone their age. He was smart; he often talked about wanting to become a biologist.

All of those good things came to an end when, this past June, he slapped her across the face.

Her face burned, but not out of embarassment from compliments; out of a harsh, stinging that remained on her right cheek for hours after the event.

Sean broke down crying after that and he apologized over and over. She tried to understand and even though she eventually told him he was forgiven, she lied. And everything was over with that.

Kelly did everything she could to just push the memories of Sean out of her head as she climbed the stairs to her apartment. She of course recognized that Sean and Todd were completely different people. And she understood that it had been over four months since they broke up. But it didn't change things. Not one bit. She was shaken by the end of that relationship and still felt as though starting a new one now just . . .

"I'm not ready," she sighed, flipping on her living room light. "I don't feel ready."

And she didn't feel that way about Todd. He was a sweet guy, though. And cute, to boot. But she wasn't ready to go down that road.

Kelly got changed. After she laid down in bed, a voice inside her told her something that surprised her.

You're going to have to be. Someday, you're going to have to go down that road again.

***

"Shot you down, huh?"

Todd nodded glumly and gulped his beer. "Yep."

Lorreel smirked. "Don't know what to tell ya."

"I know."

The party had surprisingly calmed down since Todd's little trip. There were maybe fifteen people left. The music had dimmed a little. Break on Through played now.

"I think you can take some comfort in a little friend of mine," Lorrell said then.

"Oh?"

He pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniels. "Let's have some drinks with Jackie boy here."

Coffee-Stained Romance, Chapter Four: Comics and Coffee

Chapter Four: Comics and Coffee

Other than her job at Coffee Haven, Kelly actually had a second job. This one she considered her ‘real job,’ though it wasn’t full time nor was it looking to be. She worked at the Arlington Road Convention Center. This was the job her Associates Degree had gotten her. Well, that and her Uncle Joe who ran the Convention Center. Plus, her job wasn’t exactly exciting. Basically, she worked on the webpage, which was run by her cousins Ronnie and Alexis. She took pictures and wrote copy. It wasn’t exciting, but it was something for her resume.

This afternoon, all she had to do was take a few pictures of the comic book convention. It wasn’t the first time she’s had to do something like this, but it was in fact her first comic book convention. The floor was filled with a cavalcade of people, most of which were in their teens on up. Girls and boys in Goth-y clothes; some punks. College kids with super-hero t-shirts leaning over boxes of comics, digging intently with focused concentration on finding a long-lost issue or something. Older guys with briefcases and print-outs, laughing and talking about Star Wars. And – much to her shock and surprise – no one, not a soul, dressed in a super-hero costume. No one was dressed as a character from Star Wars or Star Trek or as Batman or Spider-Man or anyone else.

As she snapped random photos, she wondered if she could relate to anyone here. She was a closet Star Trek fan and could be pretty hard-core about it when she wanted to be. That being said, Kelly had only been to two Star Trek conventions and that was nearly ten years ago. This was different.

There was an unusual smell in the air – something like sweat and b.o. mixed with old paper and dust. It was strange.

Kelly took her last picture . . . then saw someone familiar and decided she could get one more.

“Say cheese!”

There was a flash and she suddenly had a picture of Todd looking startled as he bent over a box of comics.

“Whoa!”

“Hey,” she said, lowering her camera.

“Hi. What - what are you doing here?” He couldn’t believe he hadn’t seen her earlier.

“I do some web press for my uncle. He runs this place.”

“Web press?”

“Kinda like PR.”

“Oh yeah.”

The two had seen each other in class every Tuesday and Thursday, but other than the occasional small talk, their interaction had been light. They hadn’t seen the other at Coffee Haven at all.

“So what are you doing here?” she asked him. “I didn’t know you were into comics.”

“Heh,” was his only reply. His face turned a little red in the cheeks and he uncomfortably rubbed the back of his head. “Well, yeah, I’m actually a pretty big geek.”

Kelly grinned. “Cool.”

“Yeah, I guess. I was actually helping a buddy run his booth, but since the convention is closing up here soon, he let me wander. I’ll be coming back tomorrow, though.”

“Oh cool,” she said again. “Did you get your paper finished?”

“Almost. I just have to write it.”

She laughed a little. “It’s due Monday.”

“I know. I’ve got tomorrow yet. After I’m done here, I’ll write it up.”

“Good luck with that.”

“Thanks.”

A big guy stepped between them, his chubby fingers dancing across the box of comics with a grace that his large body wasn’t able to reproduce. Todd stepped around him, his search for JLA # 32 abandoned. Kelly watched the man’s fingers, then turned to Todd.

“How is yours coming along?”

“I’ve just got go over the rough draft with a fine-toothed comb again, and then just work up the final copy.”

“Well done.”

“Thank you.”

A pair of guys pushed by them, ignoring Todd and Kelly completely on their way to find some hot Anime babes.

“You want to get some coffee?” Todd asked suddenly and as soon as he said it, he saw a surprised look on Kelly’s face.

“What’s that?”

“I . . . I was wondering if you wanted to get some coffee. There’s a Starbucks right down the street.”

She smiled a little, then rolled her eyes in thought. Todd waited, ready for a rejection. “Uh, yeah, sure. I just have to get this to me cousin real quick,” she said, lifting up her camera. Quite accidentally, the flash suddenly flared, catching Todd’s expression of joy at the acceptance of his offer.

“A moment captured forever,” Todd laughed.

“I guess so. Listen, how about I meet you there in, like, twenty minutes?”

“Sure thing.”

“Awesome.”

Kelly gave him another small laugh, then walked away. He watched her, surprised at his own initiative in this matter. This was completely outside his normal realm of acting. But as he grabbed his last minute comics, he smiled in spite of himself.

That sunny Saturday afternoon, Starbucks was enjoying what they would consider a slightly more than average busy period. Two trios of teenage girls chatted. A woman that Todd guessed was in her early thirties sat at the other end of a long row of curved windows, talking seriously into her cell phone. Two guys nearby were talking about work while one of them held and played with a baby. A college student – Todd guessed – was sitting by himself with a laptop and a tall stack of thick books.

He sipped on a Grande White Chocolate Mocha and waited for Kelly to show up. He didn’t bother bringing in his comics, though part him thought he might as well just in case she decided not to show. He hoped that she would, but he also knew that sometimes some women creep out easily.

“Hey,” she greeted, appearing by the table like a phantom. “I’ll be right back.”

“Hey. Okay.”

Kelly went up to the counter and ordered. Todd sat there, his heart beating a little faster, trying not to stare. Instead, he looked outside. Across the street, signs for Applebees, Wal-Mart, and IHOP stood up proudly, trying to get the attention of those traveling on the highway that exited just a little down the road. The afternoon sun was glowing warmly against the clear, blue sky that was distracted only by the occasional puffy white cloud.

“Do me a favor?” Kelly said as she sat down what looked to be a Tall something. “Don’t tell my boss I’m here. I think he’d kill me.”

“Why is that? Is he one of those anti-Starbucks guys?”

“Not really, but he constantly accuses them of stealing our customers since they put one in the Hub.”

“Ah. I guess I can understand that, though to be honest, I prefer Coffee Haven. It has a certain quality to it.”

“Unique?”

“Yeah. Definitely.”

She nodded confidently. “I love coffee houses. I mean, I like Starbucks and Caribou Coffee and the like, but you can’t beat a privately-owned coffeehouse.” She paused and looked to her drink. “I have a bizarre interest in coffee.”

He snorted a little. “I have a bizarre interest in comics. It’s not a big deal.”

“But at least comics are normal.”

“Ha! Glad you understand.”

“Heheh, well, okay . . . it’s not like everyone is into comics.”

“They should be. They’re good.”

She drank some of her coffee. “I guess not everyone’s into super-heroes.”

“Comics aren’t just about super-heroes.”

She snapped her fingers. “Oh yeah, yeah. What are those shows on after Family Guy on Adult Swim? Anime? I guess there’s that.”

“Oh well, yeah, there’s that, but that’s something else all together. Comics aren’t just about science fiction and fantasy and super-heroes. It’s a very elaborate form of storytelling. Everyone just looks at these clichés and at these ideas that stem from that stupid Batman show from the 60s. Comics – super-hero comics – stopped being ‘Bam! Pow!’ decades ago.”

“Oh?”

“Yes! It’s about a marriage of literature and art. It’s a form of storytelling that is engraved in human history. Cave man paintings? Hieroglyphics? There are some people that consider those a primal form of comic storytelling. They’re far more than the average person gives them credit for.”

“You’ve had this little rant saved up for a while now, haven’t you?”

“Well . . .” His face blushed just a little. She smiled. It was cute. “I guess so, yeah.”

She sipped her coffee. “Well, I never really thought of comics like that. I was dragged to a few super-heroes movies. They were pretty good, I guess. The X-Men movies were good.”

He nodded. “Yeah, they are. The comics are good too.”

“Oh?”

“Yes. I can – I can loan you some.” He took another drink of his coffee. It was starting to cool, becoming a little sweeter as the syrup settled and the coffee cooled. “But, uh, like I was saying, there’s more than just super-heroes. There are tons of other genres. My philosophy is that for every movie or television show or book, there’s a counter part in the comics for them.”

“And what comic would you suggest for me?”
“I don’t know what you’re into.”

“I love movies. Old movies, especially, but I like a lot of different movies. And coffee, like I said.”

Todd paused, thinking hard, but bringing up a lot of blanks. “Hmmm, uh, let me think here. Road to Perdition, the one that was adapted into a movie with Tom Hanks? That’s a good one. Maybe League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.”

She shook her head passionately. “No, no. I don’t think so. The movie was terrible.”

“Oh, yeah, the movie is a pile of shit, but the comic is fuckin’ brilliant.”

“I can’t imagine that.”

“It’s true! Trust me.”

“Okay, well, what else?”

“Blankets, maybe. It’s pretty great. Artsy, but good. If you’re into that.”

Her eyes lit up. “I think I’ve heard of that, actually. It was reviewed on NPR.”

“You listen to NPR?”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. I’m a dork. But I love it.”

“Isn’t it just all talk radio or something? I know they play at Coffee Haven all the time, but I usually tune it or listen to my iPod . . .”

“Ha! IPod, heh, Mr. High-Tech . . .”

“It’s freakin’ sweet, is what it is.”

“Maybe. I can’t afford one.”

“I got it for a birthday present, actually.”

“Oh, I see.”

They both paused, silence filling in. Kelly drank and looked outside briefly. Cars zoomed by. The silence was a little uncomfortable and Todd searched hard for something to talk about. He figured she had heard enough about comic books.

“You-you do know what the date is, don’t you?” she asked timidly.

Todd nodded solemnly “Yes.” He paused. “Where were you?”

She lowered her eyes. “Home, sick. I remember lying in bed when the phone rang. It was my Dad, telling us that a plane hit one of the towers. Between the time he found out and we turned on the TV, the second plane hit. You?”

“School. They tried to continue on with classes, but most of the teachers wanted to watch it all happen as much as we did. One of my teachers actually had a daughter living in New York.”

“Bet she was worried.”

“Yeah. She got a call from her in the middle of class. Grabbed her cell phone and answered it. I remember, it was a big deal because no one was allowed to use – or even have – a cell phone in the school. But she knew we wouldn’t say anything and it was pretty ‘fuck you’ to the administrators if they got on her about using the phone in class. But yeah, her daughter called, and she answered and she just broke down crying when she got the call. Her daughter was near ground zero.”

“Now we’re at war.”

He nodded. “Yeah. I remember being all gung-ho for the war in Afghanistan. Now look at this mess in Iraq.”

“You don’t have to tell me. I have a brother over there.”

Todd started. “Really?”

“Yeah. It’s . . . not easy. He joined up so he could hunt down Osama. Now he’s running around Baghdad or wherever.”

“How does he feel about that?”

“He hates it. It’s not what he signed up to do and it’s not like he has much say. Thank God he only has one more year of this, and then, he’s out.”

“Crimeny.”

“It’s Bush, though. That fucking idiot.” She paused and looked at him, worried that maybe that was too much. Instead, he had a look of sadness mixed with curiosity and uncertainty. “Sorry. I’m a pretty hard-core Democrat.”

“Ah, well, so am I, I guess.”

“You guess?”

“Yeah. I’m definitely not a Republican. I mean, I believe in God and all that, but eh, yeah.”

“Since when did Republican become the same thing as being Christian? I hate that. I’m a Christian too, but I can’t and won’t support Bush. All he’s trying to do right now is throw out all these so-called mid-western values to appeal to Christians. All this bull-shit about abortion, the space program, and gay marriage. It’s all just crap to win over voters.”

He avoided saying anything to contrary, though Todd wondered just what in the world the space program had to do with mid-western values. He also avoided saying that the Democrats were doing a very similar thing to what Bush was doing – appealing to left-winged values in the hopes of winning over their votes. He worried about offending her, but also, he worried about revealing that when it came to politics, he wasn’t very passionate.

“Just as long as we can get out of Iraq,” he said after a pause.

“Well, that’s the bitch of it, Todd,” she said now a little louder and it was only the very few times she had ever said his name. “It’s not just getting out of Iraq, y’know? It’s not like World War Two or Korea or even Desert fucking Storm. We just aren’t to raise our fingers in the air in the shape of a ‘V,’ declare victory, then head on out with a perfect mother-fucking country sitting there. We are stuck there. We are so god damn tangled up with these insurgents and rebels and fucking terrorists that we are stuck there for years. Bush can stand on a stupid air craft carrier and yell out ‘Mission Accomplished’ and fly a stupid jet as though we’ve captured Saddam and Iraq is the perfect country, but - ” She stopped, her heart thundering, her breathing heavy. A nearby couple were staring. She looked to Todd, her face burning with embarrassment.

Oh my God, he’s going to go running out of here at any second, she realized.

“I’m . . . sorry about that. I’m just – you can’t get me started on that subject without expecting me to get all sorts of worked up.”

He waved his hands. “It’s – it’s okay. You want to change the subject?”

She nodded. “Please.”

“What’s your major?”

“English, I guess. You?”

“Graphic Arts and Illustration.”

“You’re an artist?”

“Trying to be.” He picked his cup, which was now empty. “I actually, heh, am trying to launch webcomic, but I don’t know a damn thing about building a website.”

“My cousins run my uncles website for the convention center. I could ask them to help you.”

“Oh, thanks. Yeah, hook me up with their e-mail.”

“Sure.”

“So . . . English? Anything you can do with that?”

“I don’t know. I want to be a writer. I have a few blogs and I actually have my Associates Degree in Technical Communication.”

“What’s that?”

“Writing, like, for websites and catalogs and technical manuals. It’s . . . okay, I guess.”

Todd started ripping the overlap of the coffee sleeve off. “Where did you get your Associates?”
“Stark State. Every heard of it?”

“Nope.”

“That’s okay.”

“Big plans for tonight? Saturday night, y’know? Going out to party?”

“Nah. I gotta work tomorrow morning.”

“You?”

“Nope. I gotta work a few hours in the morning, and then I’m back up here around 12.” He slapped the table like a drum.

“Where do you work?”

“Manny’s Merchandise,” he said with very little enthusiasm. “It’s an outlet store.”

“Yeah, I’ve been there.”

“My Dad owns the chain.”

“Wow. I bet you’re pretty loaded, huh?”

“Haha, nope. Presidents of those places don’t make as much money as people think they do.”

“But enough to get an iPod, right?”

“Ha, yeah.”

“So what’s on your iPod?”

“A lot. Belle & Sebastian is frequent right now.”

“Who and who?”

“You’ve never heard of Belle & Sebastian? That’s – okay, that’s it. I’m officially making you a CD. And I’m giving you comics.”

She laughed. “Seriously?”

“Yes. I’ll give you some Ultimate X-Men and B&S and League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. You’ll have it Tuesday morning.”

“Okay.” She laughed again. “Sounds good. But what about you?”

“What about me?”

“What am I giving you?”

“I dunno.”

“I’ll think of something,” she said, eyes looking outside again. She sighed a little as the conversation dwindled into another awkward silence, though it was less uncomfortable this time. “I should head out soon.”

“Me too. I supposed to do some grocery shopping today.”

“I did mine yesterday. Is it just me or was the prospect of doing your own grocery shopping better than actually having to?”

“Agreed. It sucks.”

Kelly smiled broadly and stood up. “Welcome to adulthood, I guess.”

Todd joined her. “Thanks.”

The pair stepped outside.

“Tuesday?” he asked.

“Tuesday,” she answered.

Todd and Kelly walked to their cars and as they got in, there was a breeze that carried with it the first hints of autumn.